Och helt plötsligt blev det tyst. Jag undrar vad som hände, vi som skrattade nyss

The unawareness in combination with the intoxication really took its toll on me.

"Partypeople, burn it up"

    

It feels like if I hold my breath you'll walk in any second and tell me it was all a mistake

Har lyckats hamna i en inre konflikt som rör en massa onödiga saker som ju ändå inte kommer att ha någon betydelse om sisådär tio dagar. Så varför bryr jag mig? Nä, nu får det vara bra. Jag försöker räkna ut mitt snitt istället och intalar mig själv om att det är helt okej.


Is there anything left in this world that will satisfy me?

Always a favorite.
And this too.


Because I'm awkward and nervous, sometimes I don't say much at all

And now all of these thoughts are coming to mind. The ones that go "..this is the last time I..".
Today was the last time I did something that I most definitely will not be missing.
Something I've been wanting to do for a while now. Sheer happiness.

I was never, never, never enough. But I can try, I can try to toughen up.

Levande är den som vill leva, mänsklig är den som inte alltid vågar, mesig är den som gråter på fest.


You don't have to speak because I can hear your heartbeat

Any music lately? Considering the fact that I overconsumed Bon Iver during the whole bus ride to and from Prague, and Woods now has a sleepy effect on me, I've turned to my more chipper playlists. Today it's this.  


But he was scared, because it wasn't his time, it wasn't his chance.

Jag har blivit tjejen som sitter längst bak i bussen i hopp om att få lite lugn och ro, tjejen som äter paj i sängen samtidigt som hon läser en generationsroman som är väldigt tidstypisk för år 2006 och som är helt övertygad om att kombinationen av de här två sysselsättningarna är avkopplande, tjejen som dricker CocaCola- Cherry istället för att köpa en påse goda grön- röda körsbär som finns i lösgodishyllorna som ju smakar precis likadant.
Seriöst, nu får det fan vara nog.


Oh, its death helps life survive

    

Stones taught me to fly. Love taught me to lie. Life taught me to die.
So it's not hard to fall, when you float like a cannonball.

Astair you're there and I'm still here, I swear I'm so confused

And so I walked on cobblestones in the morninglight in a place I had never been before. And, even though I had no shoes on, I wasn't scared of cutting myself on glass. I guess I had just toughened up a bit.

And every five minutes I look at the door, and I see you naked

"We're getting there, we're getting there," is what we keep saying to each other in hopes of getting some kind of comfort back. And then all of the sudden we'll be waking up in the morning, realizing the day has come. And there's nothing we can do to stop it. Nothing we can do to make it disappear. Nothing we want to do to make it slow down, not even just a little bit.
This is it, eh? 

Don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened


Cause I'm wasting time, now I'm wasting money again

If I kiss you where it's sore
Will you feel better, better, better?
Will you feel anything at all?

Because you can't find nothing at all, if there was nothing there all along

Den starkaste kärleken är den som kan visa sin svaghet.
- Elva Minuter


And it stings when it nobody's fault, because there's nothing to blame

.. and then there are days like this. Days that just work.

This is my song. A song that was been given to me by my dad, about 18 years ago.
It's my chipper- song.  


What goes around comes around, what goes up must come down

Why are we always trying to make long stories short? There wouldn't be any harm in making a short story just a little bit longer, would there?

00:38



Det är grönare i parken och du ropar högt när du är där
Du säger att jag skrämde bort dig, men du var ju aldrig här


And that white dress she's wearing, you haven't seen her for a while

It's kind of like being in a dry period. There is a lot that needs to be said, but not enough words. And not enough courage.
Oh, well.

Let go of my hand, you said what you came to, now leave

So, now it's May. And honestly, not much has changed. But maybe soon. Because it feels like there's nothing left to lose. Therefore.. I might do that something that I have been dreading for a while now.  


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